Category Archives: People

Is it me or is everyone pregnant in the SGV (San Gabriel Valley)?

ImageLately I have been spending a lot of time in Rowland Heights and I noticed something: so so so many pregnant women of the Asian persuasion! Every time I went to Target or to the supermarket, I would see them walking through the stores shopping with medical masks. When driving down Colima Road, the main strip of the city, I would see them, 3 or more, walking up and down the street. I was so confused. Then I started seeing vans unloading pregnant women at the mall and local strip malls. I quickly had a Homer Simpson “DOH” moment and instead of talking about this phenomenon to anyone that would listen, I remembered that I had the answers to the world’s questions at my fingertips! I quickly googled “pregnant asian women rowland heights san gabriel valley” on my phone and voila! Here is what I learned:

Birth tourism is a cottage industry growing in southern California. Women, specifically Asian women, are paying tons of money to come to the United States to give birth. Còmo?So here is the thing: it is totally legal! There are no laws preventing pregnant woman to travel, so they come here through companies like Mother of American, set up shop in a “pregnancy hotel” and give birth.

Pregnancy “hotels,” I’ve learned, are usually in apartment complexes like the Pheasant Ridge in Rowland Heights or unassuming suburban homes that have been illegally converted into hotels. One such home was converted into a 17 room hotel!

Interesting!

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What about your edges though?

Last night, for the second time, I had a dream that I was calling out someone’s edges. It makes no sense to me because I don’t think have ever had conversations with anyone about their edges in my life. In the dream (again) someone is at my door and she is being rude and saying a whole bunch of crazy shit but all I kept saying was “What about your edges though?” I think I said it like 5 times in row. Like anytime she tried to get a word in, I would say “but them edges…”

I think I spend too much time on Twitter.

The Altar

My property manager visited my place to do their annual smoke alarm inspection. Every time she has entered my apartment she has said how nice it is. I am starting to think that every other person’s place must look like shit because my place is super plain.

She walked into the dining area and I wanted to laugh because she looked at the rooster, candle burning and dried flowers and said, “wow this is nice.” I can tell she was a little freaked out about it and as a fellow Latina, I am sure, she thought it was an altar of some sort. The funny thing is, I always light candles and I had just dried some roses and didn’t know where to put them so I just put it with the rooster.

Dear St. Rooster,

Will you help me with my troubles?

Ashe!

Confession Friday

I like to do hood rat things stuff with my friends!

Shout out to Latarian Milton!

I love doing hood rat things with my friends. It makes me happy. Living in DC for so long I almost forgot my “roots”. Spending some time in RI has really reminded me of my favorite past times and why I loved them so much. For instance, last week I went to my favorite dive bar, saw everyone I haven’t seen since middle school then we went to Broad Street to get street food. Broad Street is a  strip in Providence where you can get every Dominican delicacy imaginable and in a food truck no less. So we hang out on broad Street, eating food seeing the clubs get out, witnessing fights, babymomma drama, SWAT teams… and I felt at home. I will miss this and I have missed this.

Confession Friday

I used to be terribly shy…

No one believes me when I tell them that. I think I had social anxiety disorder, like seriously. I could not be in a room full of people. I would just become a wallflower and want to leave. I never would approach people.  I’ve always had a boyfriend and he was always my best friend. I remember in middle school,  a girl named Divina L. said “If you ever opened your mouth around people, you would be really popular”. I just laughed it off but I planned for high school.

In high school I became way more outgoing and talky. I gained a lot of friends and for senior superlatives, I was voted “Class Clown”. In college I started being super shy then as the years progressed I broke out of it.

As an adult I talk to everyone and am usually quick to introduce myself to people. Recently I was in a wedding and the brides brother was having a bout of a social anxiety episode and isolated himself from the wedding guests. I explained to the wedding party that I used to be the same way and I was all but laughed at because no one believed me. I guess I have done a 180. What I can say is that social anxiety is real and so is extreme shyness. I am so glad I got over that shit.

I agree with the picture above. Although I am no longer shy I still notice EVERYTHING!

Confession Friday

Sometimes I think all gay men have monster cocks!

I started going to gay establishments with my cousin many years ago and I noticed something: all gay clubs would give out Magnums. I remember one of his friends (hey jason hey) taking as many as he can. Then I started working for a clinic in DC that focused on AIDS/HIV and they only gave out Magnums.  From there I went to parties and LGBT events that would give out condoms but only the magnums were taken, the rest would stay. So.. what the fuck is the deal? Are all the big cock men, gay? Does Trojan give these away? I am still confused. WHYYYYYYY?????!!!!! **falls on knees like Florida Evans**