That’s What She Said…

You know how some DB‘s say “that’s what she/he said…” at the end of anything people say? Lately I have had an urge to say “go fuck yourself” after everything people say. I think it is hilarious. The truth is I am always smiling and nice to people so I think if I dropped the F-bomb every once in a while it would shock the shit out of people… Here is an example…

Here is an exchange between a big-wig at my job that I know does not like me for shit:

Her: Cute shoes… Are they new?

Me: **smiles** Thank you, these old things….

What I really wanted to say was:

Go fuck yourself…

Partly because it would have been hilarious but seriously, why the fuck is she studying my feet like that and we really don’t speak so I know she doesn’t know what the fuck I have on EVER… Okay now, we are getting off topic.

Here are some other examples where I wanted to say it:

Thirsty Man Outside Metro: Smile Beautiful… You are too pretty to look so serious.

Me: Go fuck yourself.

Begging-ass Lady: Street Sense, would you like to buy an issue of street sense. Please get an issue today.

Me: Go fuck yourself.

Temp-that-has-been-at-my-office-entirely-too-long: Are you interested in jewelry? I am selling some at my desk.

Me: Double fuck yourself.

That’s about it. They are just as funny said in my head as I would never want to hurt anyone’s feelings… Try it sometime… but don’t laugh out-loud, the jig would be up!

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